Needs

I was thinking tonight about in the Bible where Jesus tells us to pray for whatever we need, and He will answer. Looking back, so many of my unanswered prayers are not about "needs", but rather they are "wants"... and in the culture we live in, it is very easy to think that our "wants" are really "needs". I have learned as I mature in my relationship with Him that God is not a genie for me to spout out my wishes and then rub the lantern, hoping he will grant them for me. Nor is He like a father and me his spoiled child, giving me everything I want and letting me be the center of his world. (Thank God! What kind of God would that be if He let mere humans control Him? Would that be a God worthy of all our praise? If He answered our every request, whether selfish or not, wouldn't we be essentially praising ourselves and He our puppet?)
I think about times where I would go days without acknowledging Him, and then as soon as I had a need arise, I would come running to Him shamelessly asking for help. When I think about treating Him like that now, I have to fight back tears. (And it's not because it's bad to run to God when you have needs, don't misunderstand what I'm saying.)
But it is because my eyes have been opened so widely to the fact that God does not exist to please me...
I exist to please Him. And I am NOTHING without Him.
He is the Potter, I am the clay.
He is the Master, I am the servant.
And when the servant starts feeling like her Master owes her answers to things she knows very little of and He knows everything about, the servant is out of line and shows no respect for or reverent fear of her Master. And this truth is what comes over me when I approach the throne room of God pouring out everything that's on my heart and mind without first taking a moment to think about WHO it is I am talking to. He's the King of all Kings, the Creator, the Everlasting One, the Prince of Peace, the Holy and Almighty God.
Yet, He never tells me to stop making my requests known and He never turns me away, because...
He is my King, and I am His princess.
He is my Daddy, I am His beloved daughter.
So where I deserve to be chastised as a servant out of line, He extends grace... patience... gentleness... LOVE.
He loves us so much. We truly do not know the depth and width of His love, because it knows no boundaries. And I don't want to treat Him poorly, because He has literally given His life up as a sacrifice not only to save me from death but also so that I can enter into a deep, intimate relationship with Him.
I am so glad that when I have thrown tantrums in the middle of life's hurricanes, He has gripped me tightly and whispered in my ear, "I know what I am doing. Just watch and see. Trust Me." And over and over again, He proves to me that He is worthy to be trusted. Not only that, but He is worthy to be praised. He is worthy to be placed as Ruler of my heart, my soul... my life.
So I wrestled with whether to post my prayer from earlier tonight, and I've decided to do it.

I don't need to ask You for more money... but I do need You to give me wisdom on how to use what You've entrusted to us.


I don't need to ask for a new car... but I need the one I have to be dependable and not become a financial burden.


I don't need the trendiest clothes... but I do need my clothes I have to do what they were created to do: Cover me well - preferably without losing shape or fraying or shrinking or getting stained.


I don't need good health... but I need to know that You will use me- in my seasons of sickness and health- for Your glory.


I don't need answers as to why You let bad things happen on this earth... but I need to know I am doing my part to be a beacon of light and hope amidst the darkness and despair. I need to know I am giving - my time, my service, my resources, my prayers - the way You want me to.


I don't need to see You to believe (though I look forward to looking into your eyes one glorious day)... I need to know You see and believe in me. Because I see evidence of Your mighty hand at work everywhere I look: The sunset, the clouds, plants, creatures, people... they all were created to speak of Your glory.


I don't need the American dream... I need the God reality. While the American dream focuses on love of self, God reality focuses on love of Him and others. In eternity, I will never regret not having a bigger home or higher paying job or a fancy SUV with stick figures on the back windshield of my perfect traditional family unit. But I will regret letting stuff take my attention off of You. I want to be eternity-focused God, not earthly-focused. Let any stuff in my life be used for You or take it away.


I don't need a 4.0 GPA... but I need to be keenly aware that when I am in school I am still to be representing You. (Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. -Colossians 3:23)


I don't need to feel accepted by others... just as long as I am living exactly as You desire me to. You have accepted me despite knowing everything about me- the good, the bad, the ugly. Since You - the Creator of the UNIVERSE and everything in it! - accepts me as I am, who else do I need to gain acceptance from?


I don't need a smooth, as-painless-as-possible future... because I know that You hold my future in Your hands. You are already there. When trials come, You stand as my strong fortress, ready to show me Your plans and purposes amidst the pain. And You are more than enough for me.


I don't need to plan out every possible detail of my future... because I trust You, and look forward to walking out every single day of my life with You.

The next time you are approaching God in prayer, take a moment to stop and think about who He is and what He's already done for you. He already knows you inside and out. He watches over you as you sleep and eat and work and play. He knows what is on your heart and mind before you even speak a word. So be real with Him, but try not to be the spoiled kid that wants to rule the universe. And if He says no, don't get mad... Trust Him, because He is a perfect, holy Father and He knows best.